Tuesday, March 13, 2012

|Secrets of Queen Elizabeth|

Old queen
Well, they aren’t exactly “secrets” anymore or I wouldn’t know them, would I? But I guarantee you that some of these things will make you say, “How the hell does he know that?”

1. Queen Elizabeth II usually has corn flakes or porridge for breakfast — and eats it out of a plastic Tupperware container. God’s honest truth. The richest woman in the world, who has gold plates and Ming Dynasty bowls stacked up in the cupboard, eats her morning cereal out of a plastic Tupperware container.

2. Queen Elizabeth usually eats lunch and dinner alone, unless she is at a formal function. Sometimes she summons one of her children to have lunch with her. Elizabeth and her husband, Prince Philip, have drinks together in their private quarters before dinner, but then he goes his way and she has dinner alone in front of the TV.

3. Elizabeth’s evening drink is a glass (or two) of vermouth.
lizandphil
4. Elizabeth and Philip are kissing cousins. Philip is the Queen’s second cousin (once removed) on his father’s side and first cousin ( twice removed) on his mother’s side. No wonder most of the kids are idiots. Oh, you know that’s not true. It was just lying there in the middle of the road and I had to kick it.

5. Elizabeth met — and fell in love with — Philip, then Prince of Denmark and Greece, while he was a cadet at Britain’s Royal Naval College in 1939. She was 13 at the time, but there would never be another man for her.

6. Elizabeth’s parents didn’t want her to get involved with Philip, partly because he was stone broke and partly because his two sisters were married to German noblemen aligned with the Nazis. Elizabeth’s mother sometimes referred to Philip as “the Hun.”
young queen
7. As well as being Queen of the United Kingdom, Canada and 15 other independent states in the Commonwealth, Elizabeth is also Duke of Normandy and Paramount Chief of Fiji. Prince Philip, on the other hand, is considered a reincarnated deity on the South Pacific island of Vanuatu. The small tribe that holds Philip in such high regard made a formal request for a photo of Philip wearing nothing but a traditional (in Vanuatu) grass penis sheath. Philip ignored the request.

8. Buckingham Palace is the Queen’s principal official residence but she doesn’t like it very much — especially since 1982 when that nasty Irishman Michael Fagan broke in and sat on her bed talking to her for 10 minutes before palace security finally showed up. Elizabeth considers Windsor Castle “home.” Buckingham Palace has 78 bathrooms. The Beatles claimed they smoked a joint together in one of those bathrooms before receiving their OBEs from the Queen in the 1960s.

9. Elizabeth is the only person in Britain who doesn’t have to have licence plates of any kind on her cars. She has eight official state cars — two Bentleys, three Rolls Royces and three Daimlers, all painted royal purple (the official description is “claret” — a winish red colour that’s pretty close to purple). You can always tell which vehicle the Queen is in because a removable silver figurine of St. George on a horse is always placed as the hood ornament on the Queen’s car.
Lilibet
10. As a child, Queen Elizabeth II was known by her parents and sister (Margaret) as “Lilibet.” Ah, isn’t that cute.

BONUS: Elizabeth’s first solo act as a royal dignitary was reviewing a parade of Canadian airwomen in England in 1945. Elizabeth went on to join the Women’s Auxiliary Territorial Service as No. 230873 Second Subaltern Elizabeth Windsor. She became a truck driver and mechanic. Elizabeth is the last surviving head of state to have served in uniform during World War II.

subaltern 
Info taken from: http://blogs.canoe.ca/parker/general/secrets-of-queen-elizabeth/

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